Wenig Kalorien

Review of Wenig Kalorien by Carbonated Water

The frontman of Carbonated Water asked what I thought of their latest release, Wenig Kalorien. The guy is only 16, which is wild to me, considering at that age I was mainly occupied with picking my nose and playing with Lego (not that much has changed).

What this album is, in a sentence: two genuinely great songs, a handful of experiments that don’t quite land, and a recording that sounds like it was made in the room next door. The potential is real. The follow-through is where the band still has work to do.

The album starts off strong with ‘Every Day’. It leans furthest into punk rock and reminds me a lot of early work by The Chats, all forward motion and attitude. The vocals have real bite here, the riff actually commits to something, and even though there’s still room to grow, this is the song that tells you the band knows what it sounds like when it’s working. If ‘Every Day’ had been the template for the rest of the record, this would be a different review.

‘Sandwich’ opens on a Rage Against The Machine-style guitar and drum combo, and since the vocalist is obviously German, his accent at the start turns him into something like a German Geordie Greep, which I mean affectionately. The track wants to be dirty and heavy, and the writing supports that, but the mixing flattens it. Everything sounds light and far away, as if you’re listening through aeroplane headphones. There’s a great song buried under the production.

‘3 a.m.’ is where the band’s instincts pay off. An almost psychedelic guitar riff pulls you in, and just when you’ve settled into it, the track drops into straight punk rock. The punk section is simple, but it’s executed with more conviction than most of what’s around it, and the structural surprise gives the whole thing a shape the other tracks don’t have. This is a band thinking about how a song should move, not just how it should sound.

‘I Need You’ sounds like the band goofing off after the recording session wrapped. The riff is rudimentary, the vocals miss the target entirely, and the whole thing should have been either reworked or cut after an honest listen back. It shows the band has fun making music together, but the track itself adds nothing to the album.

The opening drums on ‘My Mom Made Me Brussels Sprouts’ are the highest quality, most developed instrumental on the whole album. I’m genuinely not sure what they were going for with the xylophone, though. The track is well-mixed and fun, but if a deluxe edition ever happens, please make it the xylophone-free version.

‘I Hate Brussels Sprouts’, yeah, me too man. This one sounds most like a jam session that got recorded and dropped onto the album. I love the key work in the background, but the guitars sound cut off or just slightly off in places, and these are the small details that separate a song from a sketch. If they tightened the playing and stopped settling for the fourth or fifth take, they’d close that gap quickly.

‘Lied für Alexei’ is out of place for sure, but it’s very cute and shows potential beyond just hard rock. It gives them room to breathe, and you don’t want to become a one-trick pony.

And then there’s ‘Blue Pyramid’. I don’t know what happened during the recording, but this is by far the best song on the album, and it’s the track that makes the whole review worth writing. It sits closest to experimental rock, built up in distinct sections. The opening is fragile and full of atmosphere. The middle brings in the guitars and a real solo. The third section hands the lead to the piano and rides out on strong vocals and a grandiose finish. The mixing has actual depth, the vocals are at their finest, and the whole thing doesn’t sound like teenagers messing around. It sounds like a band that can take itself seriously. The riff in the middle section drags a little before the piano takes over, which is the only thing keeping this from being flawless. It makes sense that ‘Blue Pyramid’ sits at the centre of the album. It’s the centrepiece, the proof of concept, and the reason to keep listening.

‘Summer of Love’ sounds like it was made right after watching Adventure Time. The album would have ended on its high note with ‘Blue Pyramid’, because this song doesn’t fit the record around it. I respect the experimenting, but it feels out of place.

If Carbonated Water tightens the mixing, sharpens the writing, and learns when to cut a track instead of keeping it, they could really go places. With ‘Blue Pyramid’ and ‘Every Day’ already on the record at 16, the ceiling is high. The next album is the one I’m actually going to be waiting for.

Featured Tracks

Every Day

3 a.m.

Blue Pyramid